Picture it. It’s a typical Wednesday night and the clock blinks an alarmingly red 7:53pm at you. You have everything set up; you checked the TV guide and verified the correct time and station – factoring time zones into the equation. You even used two brand new tapes, fresh from the shrink wrap, to make sure that you had plenty of space. If you have timed everything perfectly, you will hit the record button on the TV taping Buffy the Vampire Slayer in the family room and then run downstairs to your room in the basement and hit record button just as Charmed is about to begin.

Can you remember a time before the miracle that is DVR or Tivo? In a time before websites provided free streaming videos of your favorite TV shows, I remember having a library of VHS tapes – everything from TV movies of the week to the X-Files. Sometimes when I would run out of tapes and was unable to get more, I would have to make a difficult decision and sacrifice a tape to get taped over.

I remember giving family members explicit directions on taping my show, asking them if they were going to pause during commercials or periodically check in on it to make sure it was still recording. Or tapes having vague labels or labels that ripped off forcing you to put the tape in the VCR just to find out what was on it.  I also remember the devastation of miscalculating how much space you had left on a VHS tape and it cutting out during the final minutes of the epic season finale of your favorite TV show. Or even more tragic, watching your VHS tape slowly decrease in its quality – due to over-watching – to a point where you can no longer watch it.  

It’s scary to imagine that there is a generation of youth growing up lacking this pivotal character building experience.  The increase in channels and potential television shows to occupy one’s time with has come with an increase of venues to watch said programming. Though I don’t relish the days of the VCR nor have any desire to go back to them, there was something exhilarating of successfully taping multiple shows. There was a certain joy in having the ability to fast forward through commercials – no matter how slow the fast forward function was. However, I do not miss trying to find places in my room to store my VHS tapes. ;)

Top Five Reasons Why the Gays Love Buffy

Earlier in  the year we learned that individuals were thinking of doing a “Reboot” of Buffy the Vampire Slayer in a new movie. However this new project would involve no one from the original production including creator/producer/god Joss Whedon. Over the past couple of months a number of the original stars have expressed their outrage at not including Whedon in the planning of the new movie and have dismal hopes for the new movie. I loved Buffy the Vampire Slayer; I obsessively watched all 7 seasons of the show which ran from 1997-2003, recorded every episode on my VCR, and had a myriad of collectables including comics, action figure, posters, soundtracks, jewelry, and more. I even used Sarah Michelle Gellar as my “beard” in middle school. I began thinking about all the reasons why I – and every other gay person I know – loves Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Here are my top five reasons for why the gays are in love with Buffy.

  1)  A Never Ending Parade of Hot Vampires and Boyfriends – who are usually one and the same.

David Boreanaz, James Marsters, and Marc Blucas …. That is all I have to say. Joss Whedon knew the target audience for his show and therefore knew that nothing would get us gays into a greater twitter than hot, sexy vampires typically wearing tight leather outfits and speaking in delicious British accents. Like most heroines that kill demons and the scourge of the underworld, Buffy often had a line of gentlemen callers all trying to earn her affection and good god were they hot. Before Bella whined and begged Edward to turn her or Elana falling for the weak and kind of wussy Stefan and even before Bill proposed to Sookie there was Buffy and Angel. The quintessential human/vampire romance that is bound to end in death, dying, and destruction, Buffy and Angel moved us with their love and general hotness. When Buffy and Angel had sex for the first time I felt the collective gasp of the entire gay community.

 2)   A Lesbian Love Affair for the Ages

Joss Whedon - along the cast of Buffy - ventured into unchartered territory when they created the love affair between fellow witches Willow and Tara.  To my knowledge, this was the longest same-sex relationship on television at the time and also the most beautiful. Rather than attempt to shock viewers with the lesbian relationship in an attempt to raise ratings – AKA THE O.C. - Whedon organically developed the relationship between Tara and Willow. Willow’s friends and families had to make adjustments to the new development and we as audience members saw the growth and development of their relationship. Whedon unapologetically and bravely tackled difficult and controversial issues throughout the entirety of the show, but sexual orientation was definitely one that he gave much time and attention to.  

3)   Before GLEE Made Breaking out into Song Popular, Buffy had a Musical Episode

Perhaps one of the greatest episodes of Buffy ever made, the musical episode “Once More with Feeling” made the sixth season of Buffy worth watching. Whedon drew inspiration from Little Mermaid, Pippin, and Sondheim which loosely means that the musical episode was invariably going to be gay gay gay Liberace gay.  This impressive musical also had a sense of unpolished vocals on the part of the actors which added to the authenticity of the performance. This episode rose the ranks of popularity and now stands as a cult classic and favorite among Buffy enthusiasts.

4)   A Number of Flamboyant and Exuberant Villains

Whether it was the valley girl Hell god that yearned for fashionable accessories or gay vampire named Mr. Trick, Buffy has always had a plethora of villains that have both chilled us with their evil ways but made us laugh with their eccentric mannerisms and witty comebacks. Even though the villains were often menacing they had this bit of flair about them which had me questioning whether or not they were all gay. I’m just saying. …

5)  Buffy and Her Merry Gang of Outsiders 

At its core, Buffy the Vampire is a coming of age story, where young adolescents are attempting to discover who they are, while trying to not get killed by vampires, imprisoned in cheerleading statues, or sucked into an evil hell dimension. Buffy and her friends – Willow, Xander, Oz – were outsiders in Sunnydale and therefore gay people could easily identify with their struggles of not fitting in and dealing with social isolation. Much of the language used parallels “coming out”. Buffy fervently desires to be a normal high school girl that goes to prom, attends college, has a family – though many of these dreams she has abandoned due to her slayer identity. Buffy’s mom even asked her if she has tried not being a slayer eluding that Buffy is perhaps making a “choice” to be a slayer instead of being born with it.  Buffy became a beacon and role model, standing up for herself to her bullies, destroying the forces of evil, and doing this all with perfectly styled hair and fashion-forward shoes.

^{Right now it is Spring Break in Reno for college students, and although I am not a college student, the past couple of days I have been indulging myself in laziness and general slothfulness. Part of that entails me not getting out of bed and watching entire seasons of TV shows in one day. I borrowed seasons 2 and 5 from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. What an epically amazing television show, full of great witty characters, complex and in-depth plot lines, and hot hot hot vampires to stare at in awe and wonder.}

^{Sci-Fi television shows are just not written and directed like this anymore. Buffy is produced by Joss Whedon – a monumental Titan in the world of Sci-Fi – who has produced such shows as Angel, Firefly, and Dollhouse. The show is dark, sometimes scary, and people certainly die but there is a sense of whimsical humor that comes out of the show. The world might be ending, but Buffy will make some pithy comment about how the demon just ruined her brand new coat.}

^{Aside from that, the two main vampires of the show – Angel & Spike – are ridiculously hot and are by far the best vampires in the history of portrayals of vampires in the world of entertainment. Vampires in Buffy are strong, but not so strong that they are unbeatable, beautiful seductive creatures but when they transform they are hideous demons, and when they die turn to dust – none of this I am going to explode in a nice spray of bloods, guts, and gore bullshit. Angel is the original tall, dark, brooding sexy vampire – so move over Edward Cullen, because you may be tall and brooding but most of the time you have a look of sheer constipation on your face and have a pasty emaciated figure, EAT A CHEESEBURGER! I also like that vampires are demons devoid of a soul and the only way for them to truly live this morally right existence is for them to have their soul put back into their body – a mentally and physically grueling process. No more of this vampire vegetarian bullshit. Are you kidding me? You are a beast from hell, with supernatural abilities, that loves hunting and killing humans and one day you are going to wake up and no longer have an appetite for it? Vampire Diaries, Twilight, and Tru Blood all touch upon this notion of restraint and control. That's what makes Buffy so interesting – Angel is in constant danger of loosing his soul and becoming a blood-thirsty killer,  something that he cannot control. So basically, vampires are for real real not for play play in Buffy.}

^{I also like the theme of the strong independent woman that is conveyed with vampire slayers – one girl in all the world with the strength and power to fight the vampires. It is very feministy, without pouring it down your throat. Though Buffy is this amazing fighter of good, she still embodies many of the same fears and insecurities that we all have: boy problems, passing classes, worrying about her future, as well as evil demons attempting to destroy the world and bring about eternal hellfire. Sarah Michelle Gellar is epic in the show full of puns, pithy comments, and beautiful hair styles. Similarly, because I am proud member of the homo-explosion team, I appreciated Joss Whedon presenting images  of same-sex relationships and love within the show. Willow and Tara's relationship on the show represents some of the first depictions of lesbianism on TV – and the best part of it was that they were WITCHES!! So they could be lesbionic with their cats and then cast spells on haters. I really recommend this show to everyone – you'll laugh, you'll cry, and you'll see the ORIGINAL Bella and Edward relationship, which is hotter, less annoying, and full of more teen angst.}

Reasons Why Buffy is Far Superior to Other Vampire Shows/Movies 

1. Lesbian Witches

2. Lead female character is a strong ass-kicking slayer, instead of a whiney bitch that gets everybody killed including sometimes herself.

3. Vampires are hot and do not glisten in the noon day sun

4. There is more than just vampires in the show to keep it interesting

5. Werewolves are actually werewolves instead of large dogs

6. No such thing as vegetarianism in the vampire world