Urban Dictionary defines the vaguebooking as follows:

 Intentional or unintentional vague or ambiguous facebook status message, which people have no clue as to what the heck you are talking about. Also included is posting fragmented song lyrics without stating the artist.

Also . . . .

An intentionally vague Facebook status update, that prompts friends to ask what's going on, or is possibly a cry for help.

Does this sound familiar to you at all?

This is not a new phenomenon – lest we forget about the trials and tribulations if AOL and instant messaging we all experienced during middle school. I am just so happy that this act has a term associated with it now.

Now, I will put it out there that I am totally guilty for engaging in random acts of vaguebooking from time to time. I try to avoid it but sometimes it is so delicious and cathartic. I love the thrill of picking out what emo-tastic quote or dramatic song lyric I am going to use as my status. The anticipation of leaving the status up there hoping that the person to whom I directed the status toward will read it and wonder to themselves; “are they talking about me?”

It is so passive-aggressive at times and self-serving but I love it none the less. My favorite examples of vaguebooking for myself are as follows

(1)  The dramatic-but-super-empowering-Broadway-ballad-sung-by-a-diva – perfect example of this is “Defying Gravity” from the musical Wicked.

(2)   The dire and vague status that denotes that the world is going to end – this one is a little more over-the-top (more so than Broadway, I shudder to think). Often it involves leaving messages like:

Waiting for the black hole in my soul to melt away

Why does everything feel like it’s falling apart?

 Although I generally find vaguebooking annoying, I support people’s right to do it. However the one example of vaguebooking I would like to ban is the direct-passive-aggressive-attack. They usually look something like this;

 “I JUST WANT TO SAY GO TO HELL! YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE YOU PIECE OF CRAP, I CAN’T BELIEVE I DATED YOU FOR SO LONG. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU DID. I HOPE YOU DIE!!!”

This prompts a steady stream of replies; everything from “OMG what happened” and “I love and support you” to “God get over it” and “this is really immature”.  I’m sorry but do not use your facebook status as a rallying flag to garner support for your rants and tirades – nobody cares, even if they say they do. More than anything, facebook has evolved to become everyone’s new therapist. Facebook is an outlet whereby people can share their feelings, successes, failures, dreams, and goals and receive commentary and feedback about such things. Facebook has proven more than anything that the human species as whole has way too many feelings and way too heavy of a desire to express said feelings

…… the drag queen says as she busily writes on her feelings about vaguebooking ;)

What started out as a brilliant marketing strategy may have turned into a new tactic for audience members to make demands on their television shows. A facebook campaign that gathered hundreds of thousands of people to voice their support for Betty White, applied some consumer pressure on Saturday Night Live and landed her a hosting spot on the show.

Now I have a feeling that Lorne Michaels watched in titilating expectation as he saw the number of fans on the campaign go up each day. Knowing that if he held out long enough he would have a million fans who would all watch the episode with the feeling that they themselves affected the show and had an impact on its direction. The show - which had been battling poor ratings for a while - saw a huge surge in ratings and the shows was one of the funniest in a long time.

After the epic episode of Saturday Night Live, facebook campaigns have popped up all over vying to get their own role model/icon on their favorite television show. My friend Amanda has recently started up a campaign to get Betty White to have a guest spot on GLEE as Kirk's grandmother potentially. I have also seen a campaign to get Carol Burnett to host Saturday Night Live. I would actually die if Carol Burnett had the opportunity to host. Her comedic wit and timing is unparallel and she would bring an entirely different feel and element to the show. Similarly, she is a Ginger and therefore according to Ginger law, I obligated to support her and use all of my earthly and heavenly powers to ensure that this happens.

I started doing some research and was amazed to find that many A-List celebrities have yet to make hosting appearances on Saturday Night Live or have not reappeared in years. Blog entries and newspaper articles are commenting on who might be potentially lined up next to host the show. For the moment it is a mute point because the season finale is this Saturday with Alec Baldwin hosting. So I have compiled my own list of celebrities that I would get all sorts of verklempt over hosting Saturday Night Live.

Bette Midler - Keeping within the family, I would totally die if Bette Midler hosted SNL. She hosted back in 1979 and has not been back since. Her brass loud demenor and musical comedy background could be an incredible addition to the show. Bette has so many characters and voices that they could write some really great sketches.

Meryl Streep - I was shocked that Meryl has never hosted Saturday Night Live before. She is one of the most acclaimed actresses of the past two centuries and has a comedic wit and timing that is beautiful. I mean ... for fuck's sake ... it's Meryl Streep, everyone in the known universe would tune in to watch Meryl Streep. Between her movie roles in Devil Wear Prada, Julie & Julia, Adaptation, and She-Devil and her classic operatic background, she would be a great host.

Jane Lynch - I feel that Jane Lynch is the funniest personality in TV and movies today. Her delivery and sharp timing is unmatched and her ability to improv lines off the top of her head only strengthens her already strong comedic presence. Her role in GLEE has made her a household name and personality. She could be a guest host on Weekend Update and they could even do a GLEE spoof and who wouldn't love to see that.

It will be interesting to see how much weight these facebook campaigns hold in determining the lineup for Saturday Night Live and other shows. If they do not give in, will that deter ratings? Or if they do give in, will that increase the power that consumers have? Is that necessarily a bad thing? Satisfying your audience and giving them what they want is essential for the success of the show.

 So these are just a few of the tools I use to avoid work and justify my procrastination. Now, I am a hard worker and always get my stuff done, but sometimes when it is 4:15pm and you are just ready to leave, I have no motivation to do anything of substantial worth. However, I don't want to get fired so here are my top five ways of giving the appearance that you are doing work in an office setting or paying attention during class.

1. Obviously facebook. If you are a job location that has banned the site from your network, I am deeply sorry for you. I check my facebook account probably about twenty times a day – I hope that doesn't sound extremely desperate. Also with facebook becomes everyone's favorite most annoying applications: The War Games. At one point, I owned a farm, was a vampire hellbent on destruction, an impressive mafia lord, a ruler of the high seas, and a theme park owner. Although I knew in the back of my mind that all these games were basically the same – and ultimately not real - and just involved me clicking on link boxes and waiting for my stupid energy bar to fill again so I could smite my enemies, I freaking loved them. I devoted so much time and energy into these games. It is crazy to think about and if I actually analyzed it I would probably be slightly judgmental of myself. None the less, when you are waiting for documents to load or doing some other mindless task that involves you waiting, it's a great distraction.

2. Online game sites – I have an account with Yahoo games and Pogo! But my favorite site is Wordpress. An online version of the classic game boggle, I like this game because it involves you typing out words, giving the appearance that you are perhaps writing up a document, taking notes during class, or paying attention during an all important staff meeting, but instead you are trying to think of as many three letter words that begin with S as possible.

3. My celebrity blogs. I wish I would spend the energy that I do reading celebrity blogs on learning more about current events that are taking place in the world. Reading celebrity blogs is a way from me to escape the sometimes mundaneness of the office. Also it is a great cover. Use it while you are checking email or pretending that you are doing “research” about a particular topic.

4. Now I do not know what you would classify the following category. It is along the same lines of celebrity blogs, but if possible, lacking in more substance and at times more offensive. These sites include fmylife, People of Walmart, This is Why You're Fat, Drunk Texts from Last Night. They are nice little reminders throughout the day that life, in general, could be a lot worse. You could find yourself the target of word-wide ridicule by being featured on the People of Walmart.

5. Chatting with friends through the use of Gmail Chat – it is especially fun if you are chatting with your co-workers. Your superiors cannot really question it, because you are giving the appearance of typing and working, and should anyone question it you merely minimize the conversations and state that you are checking your email waiting for a response from a client or some bullshit.

******* DISCLAIMER************

This is a completely random post and if you are someone who is easily offended by broad generalizations and assumptions, stop reading and wait for the next exciting post. Otherwise, enjoy the post.

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Ever met a guy before and start crushing on him and are unsure for which team he plays for. One semi-sure way that is backed by some sort of scientific support – I think – is to obsessively comb through his facebook profile page and pick out anything that might sway your conclusions one way or another. Here are a few tips that I have picked up throughout the years:

1. Probably one of the most important but easily overlooked signs is the “interested in” statement. If that statement is blank that is a clear indicator that your potential man crush is a Friend of Judy. Now if the statement reads interested in women, do not consider the mystery solved. To quote the immortal Anjelica Houston “nothing is final until you're dead. Even then I'm sure God negotiates”.

2. Pictures – This is probably one of the most crucial areas to examine. First, if your crush has photos of him making out with men … he might be a gay. Otherwise, another sign is if your crush has a lot of photos of himself, that he took in front of a mirror with one hand holding the camera at an angle and then slowly lifting up their shirt with the other hand … he might be a gay

3. TV Shows – Although we have become more progressive over the years and it is acceptable for heterosexual males to watch such engaging programming as GLEE there are still a few signs to tell if your man-crush is a big Mo. First of all, any show that ever was, currently is, or will ever be on the Lifetime Channel is a huge flashing neon sign that he is probably a gay. BravoTV is also in a similar position. If he specifies that one of his favorite shows is Project Runway, Tabatha's Salon Takeover, or the Real Housewives of Some God Forsaken Place then he is also probably a gay.

4. Movies – Twilight … and while the rest of the preteen girl population is setting up Edward or Jacob flags, the gays are more economical and non-discriminatory and we would just take the whole lot and have a huge party ;) Regardless, if your mans has Twilight as an interest anywhere in the whole of his facebook profile than he is a gay, not probably, just is.

5. Music: Let's be frank, most gay mens' musical tastes are that of a twelve year old girl. We might try to come off as cool by saying that we listen to “Weezer” or “The Rolling Stones”, but the second that Lady Gaga, Britney Spears, or Mariah Carey come on the radio we will all scream at the top of our lungs that this is “OUR JAM” and then break out into an impromptu dance party. So beware of the pop princesses,divas, & boy bands as well as anything that has the Disney, Original Broadway Cast, or Remix in it's title. All sure fire signs of homo-osity.

6. Books – Twilight …. enough said

7. Facebook Status Updates: If you look through the history of their facebook status updates and the grand majority of them involve slightly emo-ish song lyrics that are clearly directed toward an ex-lover but are vague enough that you are not quite sure who they pertain to … your crush might be a gay

These are just a few tips to try out the next time you are trying to answer that age old question: gay or not gay? Any other ideas or thoughts or ways to tell, comment below!!!