After a few dates with some gentlemen callers and talking to a few of my girlfriends, I was astounded to see/hear that so many men have decided that manscaping is not necessary or important in the slightest. Manscaping is not just a good idea but should be mandatory by law … ok perhaps that was a bit too dramatic. Now to preface this entry, if you have found a partner that doesn't care about the state of your Johnson, then fantastic! However do not assume that this is a universal preference.

Now I am not talking about manscaping your whole body. I typically go for a lumberjack type of mans that usually has a healthy amount of chest hair in some rugged cowboy Burt Reynolds fashion. In this PSA, I am specifically talking about manscaping your junk. All I am saying, is that if you expect me to put that in my mouth, that you better have it prepped and ready to go.

The thought might seem rather scary. Taking a razor or a scissors so close to the family jewels can be a daunting and nerve-racking task. In some ways, it's as if you were diffusing a bomb; one wrong move could result in a very unfortunate and disastrous outcome. We are not necessarily asking for elaborate design patterns, for you to bedazzle it, or spritz it so it seems like a grove of wildflowers. Just trim.

It's not too much to ask. Good maintenance and a thorough manscaping from time to time is a reasonable request considering what our male dates often request from us. It is sign to me of forethought and commitment, that should we decide at the end of a fabulous evening to bump nasties, you have taken the necessary steps to ensure that I have an enjoyable time.

I liken it to throwing an excellent mid-Spring tea party in your backyard. You would go to all the effort of choosing a design template for the invitation, wearing your best Sunday attire, and polishing your best jokes for the cheesy, yet sentimental, opening remarks just to have your yard look like some bullshit straight out of Jumanji. Your guest hesitantly enters the lanai, not quite sure what they will find, or if they will make it out alive.

So guys, make sure that if you are going to ask anyone to go down on you, that you have freshened up the space a little bit. Make sure that we do not think we are looking at something out the Twilight Zone for more than likely it will frighten us and make us not want to venture into uncharted territory again.