I finally got around to watching the hilarious and heart-warming cartoon “Despicable Me”.  Sporting the vocal talents of Steve Carell, Jason Segel, Russell Brand, Julie Andrews, and Will Arnett, “Despicable Me” relates the story of Grade-B internal thief Gru. Responsible for paltry and un-inspiring thefts in the past – the Statue of Liberty from Las Vegas and the Jumbo Screen at Times Square – Gru contrives the greatest heist to date; stealing the moon.  With a team of adorable squeaky minions and an ornery scientist as his aides, Gru sets out to achieve his feat but constantly gets foiled by his rival, the younger and nerdier Vector.  To carry out his plans, he pretends to adopt three foster girls. However his relationship with the children starts to have an effect on him and makes him question what is ultimately important in life. I laughed, I cried, and ultimately peed my pants a little bit.

The movie reminded of the “Evil Overlord List” – a collection of Dos and Don’t s for any would be super villain, overlord, or crime boss. My sister and I had come across the list about ten years ago when we were in our Star Trek: Deep Space Nine/ Babylon 5 craze. She recently reposted the list on facebook and still found the list as hilarious now as I did back then.  Here is a choice few of my favorites – the full list has 100 items – which I think are crucial for success of an evil doer.

11. I will be secure in my superiority. Therefore, I will feel no need to prove it by leaving clues in the form of riddles or leaving my weaker enemies alive to show they pose no threat.

12. One of my advisors will be an average five-year-old child. Any flaws in my plan that he is able to spot will be corrected before implementation.

20. Despite its proven stress-relieving effect, I will not indulge in maniacal laughter. When so occupied, it's too easy to miss unexpected developments that a more attentive individual could adjust to accordingly

34. I will not turn into a snake. It never helps

38. If an enemy I have just killed has a younger sibling or offspring anywhere, I will find them and have them killed immediately, instead of waiting for them to grow up harboring feelings of vengeance towards me in my old age.

54. I will not strike a bargain with a demonic being then attempt to double-cross it simply because I feel like being contrary

The full and complete list can be found here. Post your favorites!!

This Evil Overlord List is Copyright 1996-1997 by Peter Anspach